Funny Facebook Status – Don’t pass up this Facebook status

This is the one that had me cracking up, mostly cause it has a good bit of truth in it…

Robert D.”the greatest thing about Facebook, is that you can quote something and totally make up the source.” – George Washington

Micah G. wonders what a civilization of puppets would use as currency.

Luke E.  Why is the jeopardy theme song stuck in my head? It is giving me a false sense of anxiety.

James L. thinks the big apple will be an adjustment after a month without fruit or vegetables

Noah C. “Women: Can’t live with them, can’t kill them.”

Leave a comment with your brilliant Facebook Status!

Facebook Statuses from Clever Profiles

Ernie supports the Annexation of Canada! Vote yes on 6!

Ernie can read minds, but is illiterate.

Ernie is preparing to not just read about socialism in history books, but in the morning newspaper (Matt C.)

Ernie is a ninja =.= (Chris V.)

Ernie thinks Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don’t make sense. Refrigerator (Thanks Alan)

Ernie thinks life is like a box of terrible analogies (Threadless)

Ernie is making sure his deer isn’t staring at headlights (Cat R.)

Clever Facebook statuses, you’ll like these!

Ernie is planning a vacation and is leaning towards Pisa.
Ernie says, Muscle Shoals has got the swampers.
Ernie wants to expand the NFL season to 162 games.
Ernie’s NOT fat…that’s his money belt.
Ernie is: a stereotype. I’m not wrong. I’m cuddly.
Ernie is writing: Anachronistic Antidisestablishmentarianism: A Case Study.
Ernie sees golf-ball sized hail! Grab your 9-iron and let’s go…
Ernie is: thinking Pandora didn’t think outside the box.
Ernie brakes for unicorns.
Ernie is: the kid next door’s imaginary friend.

Hat tip to Yahoo subject generator for these.

Clever & Funny Facebook statuses – come and get em!

Ernie wants an Orange Mocha Frappuccino!
Ernie served in the military under General Apathy.
Ernie is: trying to think of clever things to say after inhaling from a helium balloon.
Ernie Facts: 1) Ninjas are mammals. 2) Ninjas fight ALL the time. 3) The purpose of the ninja is to flip out and kill people.
Ernie found a shortcut for next week’s marathon.
Ernie is: revoking your creative license.
Ernie is: leveraging core competencies across the extraprise
Ernie, it turns out, isn’t a Jedi
Ernie’s hobby is collecting dust

Ideas for a Funny Facebook Status.

Ernie is: thinking of a number between 1 and 10.

Ernie is: shiny (from Firefly)

Ernie is: kekekekeke

Ernie is: all your base are belong to us. (AYBABTU from gamer culture)

Ernie is: run Forest, run! from Forest Gump – Thanks to Brett H.

Ernie is: sleeping because he’s not nocturnal.

Ernie is: training to withstand sleep deprivation torture.

Ernie is: wondering when they invented the word neologism… what did they call it?

Ernie is: showing his colleagues your profile and they’re all laughing at your picture.

Ernie is: pulling weeds is like getting a 98% on a test and then getting chewed out for the 2% you missed… Thanks to Alex K.

Are you ready for a Great Facebook Status?

Ernie is: just got back from his probation hearing.

Ernie is: (has) logically deduced, absolute knowledge corrupts absolutely, therefore he is giving up studying and sleeping

Ernie is: presenting his thesis on “E=MC3: That’s Right, Einstein, I Said Cubed!”

Ernie is: being interviewed on his new novel “Sweet and Sour Pork: How Can It Be Both? At The Same Time?”

Ernie is: gathering research for his essay, “Lincoln: The Man, The President, The Town Car”

Ernie is: wondering if his new research grant will accept his thesis, “Whoops!: I Blew My $800,000 Research Grant At The MGM Grand Casino”

Ernie is: pondering the scientific evidence to support the claim “Kraft Macaroni & Cheese: So Cheesy, It Should Be Called ‘Kraft Cheese & Macaroni’”

Ernie is: reviewing extensive analysis on the topic “There Sure Are A Lot of ‘Smiths’ In The Phone Book, Dude”

Ernie is: a bit disappointed he didn’t win the Nobel Prize as evidenced by his book “Why The People Who Award The Nobel Prize Are A Bunch Of Jerks”

Ernie is: doing scientific research on “Gravity: The Devil’s Tool”

VERY funny Facebook statuses!

Ernie is: going to make hermit crabs live together Thanks – Demetri Martin

Ernie is: an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, nestled in a sesame seed bun of mystery.

Thanks – Jon Stewart

Ernie is: learning to stop worrying and love the bomb. Thanks – Dr. Strangelove

Ernie is: gunter glieben glauchen globen

Ernie is: therefore he thinks Thanks- Luke S.

Ernie is: Update your status…